Spring Is Springing

Spring is in the air! I know that’s a cliche, but it’s true – it really is in the air. Some of my perennial shrubs are becoming distinctly fragrant, and flowers are starting to appear on my fruit trees, which is attracting the buzz of the local bees. It all adds up to a palpable …

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Prank Driver

In my spare time, I sometimes work for Goober, a ridesharing company that operates all throughout Melbourne. My clients often have an interesting ride, because I like to prank them. Most people take it for the joke it is, but there are a few who leave me negative reviews. Today’s one didn’t go so well. …

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Glazing Musings

Ah, Brisbane… perpetually sunny and warm, regardless of the season. Melbourne could really stand to take a leaf out of your book. I mean, not really – that’d be weird. But you know what I mean. Maybe I can just hide out up here til winter’s over. I’m staying in my cousin’s delightful cabin in …

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Not Twinning

My sister, who I share a house with, has her heart set on redoing the bathroom in purple and peacock blue miniature tiles. She keeps using terms like ‘wet room’ and ‘spa experience’, while brandishing the Larper’s Bazaar home interiors section and hopping around in the hallway. I’m not sure how to address this, as …

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Trucking Rules

I have disgraced the good name of truckers everywhere. I feel terrible, but there’s nothing I can do about it now, other than hand in my letter of resignation tomorrow morning. I broke the first rule of truck driving, and then the second one straight after it. It all started a few hours ago when …

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Sanity Returns

You know, I think glass balustrading might be the first normal idea Sandra has had for this office, ever. There’s a divide between the upper management and down on the lower floor where everyone else works, and you can tell that the building wasn’t well-converted because they still have the old wooden banister there. It …

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Necessary Shock Protection

I will admit, when I was a lot younger, I did NOT have the proper respect for the the power of electricity. I was that toddler who was never given any metal cutlery, because I’d take it the nearest power outlet because I thought it was fun. Eventually my parents just put shock protectors on …

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The Australian Dream

I know, air conditioning in the bedroom is ‘the dream’. You could almost say it was the Australian Dream. For Americans, it’s owning a home. For Australians, it’s having air conditioning in the bedroom AND the lounge. Like, wow, slow down, Sheila. You wouldn’t want to be accused of tall poppy syndrome by having TOO …

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Get Hydrated!

‘Lemonade is overrated, it’s time to get hydrated!’ As a slogan, it works. I’m still kind of annoyed that the name is ‘Citrus Free September’ and not something more clever. Okay, this isn’t as easy as I thought, and besides, I’m just designing the poster for a Youth Club. Personally, I’m taking a break from …

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The Perfect Bag

It’s not every day you get invited to a movie premiere. It’s every OTHER day for me, but I’m working my way up as a fabulous socialite and you have to start somewhere. Once I get invited to them every single night…that’s when I’ll know I’ve made it. I’ll still reject 90% of invitations because …

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